Accidents will happen

Did you have a good weekend? hmmm
I don't suppose that, by any chance, you lost control of your vehicle on a hill due to poor grip, and slid off the road and down a 5 metre cliff... did I mention I was on the phone at the time? Let that be a lesson to you all.

Mind you, I ought to point out that when I say "my vehicle" I mean "my body", and when I say "poor grip" I really meant that I was barefoot... and perhaps you wouldn’t be surprised to hear that rather than unleaded I was running on alcohol. So, I suppose I could've just said: While running barefoot down the hill on the weekend, drunk, I slipped off the pavement and down a 5 metre cliff into a bunch of trees. But where's the theatre in that?
Luckily I wasn't damaged above the neck really. Both knees kindly broke my fall (a couple of times); and according to the nice doctor in A&E they didn't actually break themselves. The soft tissue around my kidney acted like Volvo's Side Impact Protection System. Perhaps I need to upgrade this model for something with 4WD.
Anyway, I'll be fine in a couple of days I am sure. That is until Tuesday when my wisdom teeth are being ripped out of my head. Joy of Joys. I can't wait until February. January has sucked.